COLUMBUS _ "You know what they say about a little bit of knowledge? It can be a dangerous thing, because it gives the illusion of knowing, without perspective," Uncle Chet said to his old antagonist, his sister, who sat across the table from him.
Then he hoisted his coffee, as if that had ended it.
She was about 60, face deeply lined, but hair still dark and long, and her brown eyes were like rifle barrels aimed at him.
"Citizens United lets anyone exercise their right to influence an election, which is their American right," she declared. "It lets corporations donate money and it lets unions donate money. It is not a partisan decision; it's upholding our right to freedom of speech, which is guaranteed under the Constitution."
His mug came down hard.
"There's false equivalence, if I ever heard it. Unions are dying and have been for a half-century," he snorted. "If unions weren't dying, how could corporations have gotten away with NAFTA (North American Free Trade Agreement)? Let's face it, American workers are poorer now than they were in the '70s, and all the bosses are bucking to be millionaires and billionaires."
"It was the unions that chased the jobs away," she retorted.
"It was right-wing corporate cash, of the kind we saw in the recent election, that created the campaign that swayed the Congress to sell out the workers and allow corporations to move factories offshore and continue to call themselves American, when in fact most of their work forces, and much of their loyalty, went offshore, too."
"I think they call that free enterprise," I interjected.
"Don't you start," she said.
"That's what they call it," Uncle Chet said, "but I call it economic treason, and it's ruining the government as well as the economy. At a certain level of economic disparity it's impossible to operate a democracy. In the middle ages, peasants had no chance to fend off marauding nobles, and average Americans are just as powerless compared to the rich around them, controlling their health, wealth, even what they believe."
"Unless you're a government employee," I said.
"The last bastion of the middle class," he said, "teachers, professors, public employees because they still have unions."
"That's the bloated bureaucracy that's dragging us down," she said. "Millions of people milking the system, working 25 years, then retiring for 30, living off the public dime, driving up our property taxes so we can't afford to retire."
"You haven't changed a bit," I said.
"Yes I have; I'm one of those people now, paid by taxpayers," she said, "but I still see it all around me."
"The public sector is bloated," Uncle Chet conceded. "But where's most of the fat? In the military, with bases in a hundred countries, armies in Iraq and Afghanistan. We've lost trillions in the desert, a giant stimulus package for defense contractors like Haliburton and an enormous bill for American families who've lost loved ones and been saddled with the IOUs."
"Don't you criticize our soldiers," she said as she shook her head at him.
"I don't," he said. "I criticize the liars who sent those soldiers into action, but we were talking about the bloated bureaucracy."
"I wish I could get a government job," I said. "Imagine having Martin Luther King Jr. Day off. …"
"Those guys are going to be the next to get it," Uncle Chet said.
"I agree," she said, and then to me: "Can you believe it? We agree!"
"Wait, I've got to find a tape recorder," I said.
"Public employees are going to be thinned out just when we need them most, because the fruits of Reagan-Bush rule, the jobless recovery and a cheapening dollar are going to destroy the remnants of the middle class. People are clinging to their jobs like lifeboats, as shopkeepers turn into wage slaves and wage slaves into beggars."
"What a campaign speech that would make," I said. "`Vote for me, then slit your wrists!"'
"He doesn't know what he's talking about," she said before drawing a deep breath and forcing a smile.
"Republicans have bashed the government because they want to rule directly but keep the illusion of democracy," he said. "To make that happen, they have to translate cash into votes, and to make that happen," he looked at me, "they have to own the media."
Cooperstown Bureau Reporter Tom Grace is traveling with his Uncle Chet, who he says is imaginary. Grace's column appears every other week. For more of his columns, visit www.thedailystar.com/tomgrace.
Tom Grace
At loggerheads over unions, corporate cash
- Tom Grace
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The future of news: video on the Internet
COLUMBUS _ "Well, I'm going to do it, retire tomorrow," I told Uncle Chet last Thursday, then pulled on the thick braided wire that ran up and down the chimney.
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Uncle Chet advises little miscreant
COLUMBUS _ The little miscreant is off to college this month, and we had a dinner in her honor at Uncle Chet and Aunt Alice's log cabin Sunday.
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Here's to everyone paying their fair share
COLUMBUS _ Buddy and I were working on the woodpile at Uncle Chet's house, stacking about 10 face cord of pungent ash, maple and cherry. The sun was beating down, and the pine needles crackled underfoot. Everything around us was tinder dry, that is, except the wood we were moving.
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Easy fixes for education, drilling debate
COLUMBUS _ "I know how to resolve this fracking controversy," Uncle Chet said, then sipped his second glass of red wine.
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Handicapping the 2012 race in a dust cloud
COLUMBUS _ The little miscreant was graduating from high school, going to college. We were having a party here in just four days, but we were power-sanding in the kitchen, making a dust cloud that filled the room, coating everything as it sank to the floor.
- Tuesday, June 14, 2011
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Spackle can only do so much to fix problems
COLUMBUS _ "This ceiling reminds me of my face," Uncle Chet said, standing on the eight-foot stepladder, cutting in with a sash brush.
- Tuesday, May 31, 2011
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The rich are getting richer, more powerful
COLUMBUS _ "You know, there's only one thing wrong with the world," Uncle Chet paused, then dropped a log onto the stack.
- Tuesday, May 17, 2011
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Facing down the dreaded colonoscopy
Colonoscopy. Cousin Bruce talked me into it. He's a decade younger and if he was doing it, then coming from the same gene pool, so should I, I reasoned in February and made an appointment.
- Tuesday, May 3, 2011
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Wounds left by Osama still healing
COLUMBUS _ We were lying down, reading, ready for lights out when the phone rang late Sunday night. I looked at the caller I.D. before answering, "You're too old to be up at this hour."
- Tuesday, April 19, 2011
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The rich are thriving in country's class warfare
We sat in the basement cafeteria Friday night, eating off sectioned plastic trays, as students have done for generations.
- Tuesday, April 5, 2011
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There's still one job we haven't shipped overseas
"Where are the French?" Uncle Chet asked from across the table where we were having coffee.
- Tuesday, March 22, 2011
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Obama strikes oil with assault on Libya
We were on our way to the dump Saturday, three across the bench seat, when we heard the news.
- Tuesday, March 8, 2011
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Caught between tanking dollar, rising oil prices
COLUMBUS _ "Got to get some wood in; it's gonna snow," I said as I rose from the couch Saturday afternoon.
- Tuesday, February 22, 2011
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Conversation on the trail to rock stardom
SCRANTON, PA. _ It was a cool, sunny morning in late February, and we were tooling down Interstate 81 in the silver pickup.
- Tuesday, February 8, 2011
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Cheney's chum about to get his walking papers
The snow piles were becoming tall white walls and the paths between them were narrowing as we cleared the driveway again Sunday morning.
- Tuesday, January 25, 2011
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Taxing wealthy would give us rich future
COLUMBUS _ "The state of the union is deplorable, and I hope he says so, because we ought to do something about it," Uncle Chet said, then lowered an armful of logs into the wood box.
- Tuesday, January 11, 2011
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Poll will show what people are thinking
COLUMBUS _ "I have to go, but I want to do it myself," Buddy announced from the recliner.
- Tuesday, December 28, 2010
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Target within sight; summit within reach
It was snowing and windy, and the road was icy, running between desolate, snow-covered fields in the town of Plainfield. We were climbing a long hill, up in God's country, looking for a microwave tower.
- Tuesday, December 14, 2010
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Tax deal will help rich get richer
"Dear Mr. President: "Your tax deal with the Republicans is an abomination.
- Tuesday, November 30, 2010
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GOP's denial is all about bottom line
COLUMBUS _ The little chair was a blessing to the back, but the pipe at the front of the canvas seat pressed under my knees, and my legs were numbing.
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The future of news: video on the Internet



